We met. We hit it off. And we got along great. There
was a connection developing and everyone
could see it.
So for you to turn around, four
months later, and tell me that you didn’t feel the connection – I don’t accept
that. You gave me that reason after we
spent every weekend together, after we made plans to go to a party together, to
go out of town together. And ‘you didn’t
feel the connection.’
You know, before you, I had my
heart broken so badly that it took me a long
time to recover. To trust
again. And then you came along. And you made me see what a real relationship
was like. The communication, the time
spent together, the closeness… the relationship.
What’s worse is that you broke up
with me by text. After I asked you if
everything is okay – because I hadn’t heard from you as often for one
week. You chose that moment to apologize and then to tell me ‘you didn’t feel the connection’
and that ‘you had the connection by this time in other relationships.’ So why aren’t you still with those others, huh?
Why couldn’t you end it
sooner? I’m a big girl, I can handle
it. I’d think more of you if you had
done that. I would have thought you were more of a man for owning up to it. And I would have graciously bowed out and gracefully accepted it. But you didn't. ‘I deserve a better answer
but you made your decision. I hope you
find what you’re looking for. Good luck.’ That was the last text message I sent
you. I still feel that way. And it frustrates
me to no end to know I will never know the true answer.
Was it that girl I was anxious
about? Or was it someone you met on your
trip that week? Things were fine until
then. Then you flipped the switch and
pushed me out of your life. I hope you
find the happiness you almost gave
me.
But you know what? I will be okay. I will move on and I will forgive you for
what you did. But I won’t forget. So I thank you profusely for giving me a
taste of what I wanted in a real relationship.
And I thank you for showing me that, no matter what the reality is,
there is always a way to overcome it. To
grow from it. And I thank you for
showing me that, in spite of everything that
I dealt with – being cheated on, losing people I thought cared, seeing people’s
true colors – I will learn to love again.
So thank you for making me stronger.
And I truly do hope you find
what you are looking for.
Thank you.
The Girl Who Almost Loved You
